


first burn | hamilton!au

by cyberzyu



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Adultery, Angst, Complete, Hamilton Lyrics, Hamilton References, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-21
Updated: 2018-12-21
Packaged: 2019-09-23 20:34:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,355
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17087273
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cyberzyu/pseuds/cyberzyu
Summary: a marriage tainted with lies and greed deserves to burn down to ashes.





	first burn | hamilton!au

**Author's Note:**

> *intended lowercase  
> this oneshot is following by/inspired by the hamilton spin-off song, first burn.  
> it is HIGHLY recommended you listen to the song before reading: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r2ys-AimNbE

; 2.3k words

 

baekhyun's tear stricken eyes reflected the raging, engulfing fire before him. the same fire illuminating the abyss of a room he took homage in need to bandage his heavy heart.

the affluent boy hasn't stopped crying for hours. no calming words from his brother, jongdae could even soothe his shattering heart.

"you've married an icarus," jongdae says as lulling circles were rubbed into baekhyun's trembling back.

"it seems he has flown too close to the sun.." he speaks in a mere soothing whisper.

now, baekhyun stands alone. in a pitch black room to wallow in his sorrows over a pamphlet.

a stupid fucking pamphlet.

the thin piece of paper that sealed his marriages fate for years to come.

.

chattering erupted among the municipality, "whoa! have you read this?!"

"quick, we need to grab one!"

"did you hear?! senator park released a kim's pamphlet! wonder what it's about?"

hearing his husbands name burned the tip of baekhyun's ears as he strolled through the town at dawn. it was no surprise. his husband wrote habitually.

it's like chanyeol is always running out of time when he brings the top of a feather to paper. it has baffled baekhyun ever since they met. so, he heeds no mind to the outbursts in the streets and continue his morning amble.

baekhyun was used to this, hearing his husband's name involved in the chatter of the town.

"jesus christ." he heard a nearby reader sputter words laced with disbelief.

"oh god. have you ever seen somebody ruin their own life? in just a few paragraphs?!"

baekhyun paused on his path and then he felt prying eyes consuming the back of his silhouette. he turned, some eyes flickered away back to the pamphlet gripped in clammy palms, others clung to him desperate for a reaction.

yet, the only thing he could give his inquisitive audience is an expression of utter confusion.

"his poor husband." he heard a woman mutter under her breath as her eyes scanned the paper in her hands.

"ha! park is never going to be president now with this type of shit ruining his name." oh sehun rambled to his partner, do kyungsoo as the duo brushed passed the baffled spouse of his enemy.

baekhyun's heart sunk and adrenaline of pure fear pumped through his physique. gripped fists falling to his sides he started to make his way towards the young man handing out the newly written pamphlets to the crowds.

the thin piece of paper fell into his trembling palms once his turn. he wasn't sure what he was expecting to unfold in front of him.

baekhyun loved chanyeol. he trusted him.

chanyeol was a hard-working man who did anything for his dreams and that's what baekhyun admired the most about the penniless giant.

'this can't be too bad, it just can't.'

his curious gaze began to ponder over the words,

'the charge against me is one of kim jongin, for purposes of improper speculation. my real crime in an amorous connect with his wife for a considerable time, with his knowing consent—'

baekhyun felt his stomach churn. yet his eyes kept scanning frantically down the familiar handwriting,

'i had frequent meetings with her— most of them at my own house. mr. byun, my husband and our adoptive children being absent on a visit to his father. '

"oh god."

a numb feeling overcame his body, he couldn't even feel the smoldering gazes that barreled over him even more now. then, a splurge of emotions crashed down on baekhyun.

betrayal, rage, and disgust bubbling up inside of his unstable body. 

uncontrollable tears built up in brown hues and the paper gracefully falling from quivering fingertips.

.

baekhyun focused on the crackling fire until weary eyes complimented with a new set of puffy eye-bags, drifted to the box sitting on top of their mantle.

his body moved to lean up and grabbing the mahogany box, one that jongdae gifted to him years ago. a sleep ridden gaze examining it before his curious fingertips tried to hook under the opening of the box.

yet, the sound of the door opening made him pause. candle light illuminating baekhyun's abyss, yet he didn't bother to even turn around. 

he knew who it was.

"baekhyun, please." he heard his husband's worried voice fill the hollow auditorium of a room, voice mixing with the sound of the raging fire. "talk to me, we need to.." baekhyun could tell he was tearing up, "we need to talk about this. you can't ignore me for the rest of our lives!" chanyeol called out, straining his war-weary voice.

yet, baekhyun continued to watch the colorful flames, feeling his own fire bubbling up in his chest.

a fire full of rage, betrayal, and heartbreak.

baekhyun could hear him stepping more into the room, coming closer to his slumped over body. the closer chanyeol got the more angry and bitter the subdued spouse became.

baekhyun's hesitant fingers opened the box laying in his lap.

"baekhyun please, i still love y-"

"i saved every letter you wrote me.." he cut him off. sick of his husband's pity party. as he spoke, baekhyun picked up the scattering letters within the box, his name in beautiful cursive on the top of each. opening the first one on top, tear-filled eyes glancing over 'with love, park chanyeol' marked at the end of note.

"from the moment i saw you all those years ago. i knew you were mine, you said you were mine, and i thought you were mine.."

"baekhyun, please listen.."

yet, he ignored those empty pleads.

baekhyun stood up, letters clutched in his fists, and the gifted box laying on the wooden floor. he turned around to face the guilty park chanyeol,

"jongdae was right, you're nothing but an icarus." he scoffs under his breath.

baekhyun's eyes examined the features on his husbands face. eyebrows scrunched together in confusion, the color flushed from his face, and his eyes filled with guilt and shame. he watched as chanyeol raised a hand and stepped closer, he was going to attempt to grab baekhyun's wrist and pull him close.

just like chanyeol used to do when baekhyun was unsettled or crying, in attempts to comfort the smaller, he'd always pull his partner close to his chest, to soothe baekhyun into bliss.

so, he wanted him to be blissful?

to be silent?

to just take this shit-show nobody created but himself and his actions?

he thinks he can just do that after what happened?

fuck that.

uncontrollable rage spread throughout his chest, unraveling far out as to the fingertips gripping the once love-filled letters.

"don't-" baekhyun warned in a rasping tone that made chanyeol pause his action. "take another step on my direction, i-i can't be trusted around you." he watched as chanyeol's expression twisted more into worry.

"don't think you can tuck your way into my arms, not like you used to!" eyes filled with dismay glanced down to the clutched notes.

"baekhyun, i'm so sorry.. i should of never done this to you.."

"i'm burning the letters you wrote me."

"what?"

baekhyun coldly turned his back from his blubbering husband, as he raised the notes, his other hand gripping them and beginning to rip them apart. "those have so many memories in them you just c-can't just-" a speechless chanyeol watched from the sidelines of the vandalism.

"and what's your point?" he sighed, "well, you can stand over there if you want. i have no clue who you are, but you're definitely not my husband...i have so much learn about you, don't i?"

his eyes glanced down at the ripped up paper in his hands, with no remorse written on his face.

"i've re-read these letters over and over again for years and now? after all this? i'd rather watch them all," he tossed the memories into the raging flames within the fireplace, he continued, "burn."

baekhyun watched as it quickly devoured their past, just like that.

"t-the pamphlet was never to hurt you! i promise. people were going to ruin me, i couldn't risk that, baekhyun. i had to do what i could.. please understand that."

it still baffled baekhyun that his husband was still attempting to excuse this.

"by publishing the letters she wrote you? you told the whole world how you brought this girl into our bed! all to clear your name? you've done nothing here but ruin our lives, chanyeol." poison laced every word baekhyun spat.

"sehun came to me and told me-"

"oh here we go."

"here goes what?!"

baekhyun scoffed, "your excuses! your huge fucking ego! and your dire need to clear your name before your enemies run their mouth!"

he continued, "heaven forbid someone whispers your part of some scheme, your enemies whispers so you have to scream!"

baekhyun bitterly laughs as a memory hits him,

"and i know about whispers.." he mutters under his breath.

the memory of the loving way jongdae and his husband would glance at each other, how their similar personalities would ravel and mix so fittingly, and the letters, the letters they would send to each other while jongdae lived over seas. that once, glancing over chanyeol's shoulder as he wrote a letter addressing his brother as 'my dearest jongdae'.

he can't explain the jealousy rippling through his body and spilling into his next words,

"i see how you look at my brother."

"what are you saying?"

"don't even act like you don't know what i'm talking about!"

baekhyun scrunched his eyebrows together in rage, does he not see it?

"i'm not naive, i have seen women around you."

"baekhyun.."

"don't think i don't see how they fall for your charms....all your fucking charms." baekhyun's voice once laced with disbelief and anger, faded towards the end of his sentence. his overwhelming grief controlling his voice once more.

"baekhyun, listen to me for just two minutes!"

yet he just laughed. laughed in pure speechlessness. "no! i don't want to hear your excuses. i don't want to hear your pathetic pleads any longer." baekhyun spoke with a harden, hollow tone, he continues, "i simply can't bare it."

"what do you mean?" chanyeol spoke as he saw his husband pause his next few words.

"i have to leave. i'm erasing myself from this suppose heroic history you have set up for yourself."

"baekhyun."

"i don't need to be in your story any longer, i refuse to be. we can let future historians wonder how baekhyun reacted when you broke his heart, right?! you clearly didn't want me apart of it to begin with." baekhyun's despondent hues filled with tears once again.

"i can mend that heart, i promise, i really can. i want to fix this, baekhyun!" tears have already spilled down the historian's face as he continues to plead with his spouse. refusing to let go of what is left of their marriage crashed by a sneaky home-wrecker and nobody but his idiotic self.

"fix this? you can't fix something you threw away purposefully. there's no going back, chanyeol." tears spilled down baekhyun's rosy cheeks, throwing his glance towards the rippling fire with remains of burnt paper within.

watching it all continue to burn, turn to nothing but ashes.

he refused to watch chanyeol continue to cry his tears of self pity. baekhyun knows if he does, he'll crumble.

and the last thing he wants to do is forgive him.

not now and maybe, not ever.

baekhyun speaks, "you know, when the times comes when you actually fully understand what you did was wrong and your true legacy on this earth. instead of throwing yourself a pity party once more, explain to the children the pain and embarrassment you've put their father through! what you put this family through!"

"my legacy? i am fully aware of my legacy."

baekhyun laughs, "oh you are? tell me then. tell me your fucking legacy, chanyeol. your meaning in this dreadful life full of war and death." he spat with poison in his words.

"i am here to make a difference, baekhyun! i want to change this shitty world for the better, that's my purpose! why don't you und-" chanyeol begins to explain, baekhyun feeling the tension wavering in his tone.

"when will you learn that our children are your legacy! we, our fucking family, is your legacy, chanyeol! that should be your meaning in this life! the reason you keep going!" baekhyun continues, his voice low and cut-throat, "and if you can't accept that, that's even more than enough of a reason on why i shouldn't stay."

baekhyun pushes past chanyeol, rage and his husband's never-ending treachery fueling every step he walks away from this marriage.

yet, he feels a clammy hand quickly grip his frail forearm, preventing him from taking another step towards the exit.

"please, i'll do anything for you. you're my baekhyun, my everything. i can never just let you go- i can't bare to see you go! i-i refuse to just let this crumble, baekhyun. "

baekhyun will admit hearing that disheartening tone wavering in chanyeol's voice made him reconsider walking out for a single moment.

a part of him wanted to let his begging husband scoop him up in his arms and cry into his chest, as his soft fingertips would groove their way through baekhyun's chestnut hair.

until a flash of everything that unfolded popped in his mind once more, slapping him back into the reality of the tragedy that this marriage is.

the shambles it is left in.

"your baekhyun?" he heartlessly laughs at the statement, "you still think i'm yours? even now?" he huffs, "i'm nothing to you, it seems with your actions..and you to me?"

he continues, "if you thought you were mine? even for a single second after the wool you've pulled on the eyes of this family?"

he yanked his arm out of the helpless grip of his husband, walking towards the door as baekhyun mutters his final cold words,

"don't."

slam.

baekhyun shut the door in the face of his shameful partner and what was left of their crumbling wedlock.


End file.
